Bisexual/non-Monosexual & Queer Community

Bisexual Community a place for ALL Bisexual , Non-Monosexual & Queer-identified peopleWelcome to our Bisexual Community. A friendly place for you to find listings and links to articles, pictures, videos, web comics, rants, raves, groups, events, conferences and other resource for the Bisexual, Non-Monosexual & Queer-identified Community.

Definition: Bisexual = people who ♥ people of Same/Similar Gender as themselves + ♥ people of Different Genders/Gender Presentations from themselves

Bisexuals = people who can people of SAME/SIMILAR Gender as themselves + can people of DIFFERENT Genders/Gender Presentations from themselves


DEFINITION OF BISEXUALITY: I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge that I have in myself the potential to be attracted - romantically and/or sexually - to people of more than one sex and/or gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.  from “Selected Quotes” by Robyn Ochs

Bisexuals - A person whose enduring physical, romantic and/or emotional attraction is to other people of various sexes and/or gender identities. Individuals may experience this attraction in differing ways and degrees over their lifetime. ~BiNet USA Bisexual Media Guide


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Dan Savage is starting to see some movement away from biphobia.  Slow movement, but movement none-the-less.   

First of all, he’s talking to actual bisexuals instead of talking about us.  This is a step.   Second, he is giving bisexuals a platform to talk other bisexuals.  Good.  Third, this podcast recommends two great books about bisexuality — Bi Any Other Name and Bisexual Men Coming Out Every Which Way.   Important progress is being made.

Buuuuut lets be honest.   Listening to this podcast is almost painful.  I feel like I should trigger warning it.   

Ellyn Ruthstrom of the Bisexual Resource Center does a great job with this given Savage’s prickliness, and reputation.   She also hints at an important point that I want to make it explicit.  

Savage claims that when he came out in the 80’s no one had his back, but that isn’t true.  The gay community had his back.   He was living in Chicago and he could find gay bars and gay pride parades, gay books and gay political action groups.   When gay men of his time period came out YES they risked rejection from family and friends, being fired, and yes AIDS but they also knew there was a gay community that would help them.   The gay community of that time period makes me think of the line from Lilo and Stitch — It was “little, and broken, but still good. Yeah, still good.”   It was a meager safety net — but it was one and it was there for him.   

Bisexual people coming out do not have that.  Period.  End of sentence.   The same LGBT community that bears our letter in the initial often does not have our back.   Bisexual people often face as much harassment and dehumanization from LGBT organizations as they do from the straight world.  There are no bi bars.   We get kicked out of pride parades.  Finding books about bisexuals and bisexuality is incredibly fucking difficult — TRUST ME.  The entire purpose of this blog is to look for them because it’s like panning for gold for bi people to find themselves in literature.   

Gay men like Savage did not pull themselves up by their bootstraps and change the world.   They had help.   

To expect bisexuals to come out and change the world when no one has our backs seems to me like a monstrous set-up to fail.   It allows Savage to concern troll bisexual people about how we ‘do this to ourselves’ by not being out.    And it allows him to blame us for biphobia then justify his past biphobia against us because hey, we can’t even be out so why should he have to take our concerns seriously.

- Sarah

And it is VERY IMPORTANT to remember that the help Gay Men (and Lesbians) Dan Savage’s age had back in the 1980’s, as well as the growing list of services that Lesbian/Gay people coming up now Still Have were At LEAST 50% founded, created and nurtured by Bisexual & Trans*/Genderqueer people who have been working to Create Community and For The Good of ALL QUEER PEOPLE.

Let us ASSURE you it Did NOT Occur to ANY of the Trans*, Gender Non-conforming + Bisexual Founder of the Modern LGBTQ+ Rights Movement that their titular decedents would be tossed out of the Groups and Programs THEY set up, by greedy privileged little twerps such as Aravosis, Bindle, Savage, Musto, et. al.

But what stuff like this does is once again point up the great importance of not just using local or changeable slang terms when documenting any historical events. One of the reasons people can get away with this is becasue they point to words such as, Homosexual, Homophile (popular 1950 thru 1960) and then the terms made famous during and immediately after the Stonewall Riots of "Gay Rights" and “Gay Pride” as proof that the movement was only all about Gay White Men.

And that somehow Lesbian, and Bisexual and Trans*/Genderqueer people took advantage of Gay Men and somehow ‘stole’ THEIR Revolution, with Dan Savage’s great good friend the powerful Gay spokesperson John Aravosis of AMERICAblog writing in a very well known plaintive article about how gay men need to eject the “T from LGBT:

In simpler times we were all gay. But then the word “gay” started to mean “gay men” more than women, so we switched to the more inclusive “gay and lesbian.” Bisexuals, who were only part-time gays, insisted that we add them too, so we did (not without some protest), and by the early 1990s we were the lesbian, gay and bisexual, or LGB community. Sometime in the late ’90s, a few gay rights groups and activists started using a new acronym, LGBT — adding T for transgender/transsexual. And that’s when today’s trouble started.

and the trouble is, a LOT of people believe him.

Again we have a case where bisexual (and trans*/gender non-conforming) people need to Know The ACTUAL History and be able to quickly cite and refute Biphobes, Transphobes and other assorted nuts and bigots.

VP of first know Queer Rights Group in the USA was Bisexual, Chicago 1924; major contributor to ‘The Ladder’ the newsletter of the pioneering Lesbian group Daughters of Bilitis was bisexual, USA 1950’s-1960’s; person who created first know Queer Student Organization in the world was Bisexual, Columbia University 1967; person who created the annual Pride Celebrations in commemoration of the Stonewall Riots now held annually worldwide was Bisexual, Greenwich Village NYC 1969/1970; Person who first fought a dishonorable discharge from the US Armed Services for not being straight was Bisexual, USA 1971/1972; First Bisexual Conference concluding with the release of 1st Statement for Bisexual Rights & Liberation, Ithca NY 1972; Look here at this (non-exhaustive) list of some more bisexual history collected by BiNet USA contributors

Similarly trans*/gender non-conforming people should be aware of the role they explicitly plaid in the history of the modern queer rights movement, such as the Compton’s Cafeteria riots that took place in August 1966 in San Francisco. And that the majority of the people who first fought back at the Stonewall Inn were Gender Non-conforming (as well as being QPoC but that is Another Long Story) including an AG who rallied the crowd to come to her aid after the police hit her over the head with a Billy Club. And the Queens who impeded the police by forming an impromptu kick-line (like the Rockettes) and mocked the police singing "We are the Stonewall girls/ We wear our hair in curls/ We don’t wear underwear/ We show our pubic hairs."

(via nonmono-perspective)

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    Dan Savage: Still Monosexist (there’s nothing *phobic about his behaviour toward bisexuals, which is why I crossed out...
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